Couch Potato Joker Pillows

"That's all very disconcerting, but at least you're allowed on the couch."

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

"It's tough to get him moving, but once he's going he never stops."

"I have a job! I'm an 'I reporter!'"

"Let's wait for it to come out on cable and then not watch it."

Football Accident.

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

"I hardly think you can call waiting for updates to install doing nothing!!"

'Remember, your father may be here physically, but mentally he's attending the NCAA tournament.'

"I’ve changed my mind. I no longer want to conquer the world. I just want to conquer those two..."

"You know, dear, planting your base in a chair and eating chicken is not 'plant-based' eating."

'Flipping the remote and clicking the mouse are his low-impact aerobics.'

'Here, you can have my fly trap.I already have one.'

"It's lunchtime! Have you finished saying 'Good Morning' on your WhatsApp Groups?"

'Well at least we got him off the sofa.'

'May I tidy up the infield?'

"I'm afraid that walking to the refrigerator 5 or 6 times a day does not count as exercise."

'Are you sure sitting on a bean bag chair isn't considered getting a daily requirement of vegetables?'

Man watching a huge T.V., while eating a huge box of snacks and drinking a huge can of soda

"I'm inspired to try to run a marathon."

"If you really loved me, you'd give me the remote."

Success Without Effort

"Isn't it time you had your bath?"

"I thought you were getting into shape for hunting season."

Brenda tests to see if Karl can truly handle the low points of living together.

"I'm knackered trying to keep tabs on the potential consequences of the away goal rule!"

'I swear Marge! If that little punk comes back in here and pushes all them buttons again, i'm gonna kill him!' - Life in the elevator.

"Moving to a chair to eat three times a day really isn't 'doing sit-ups!'"

"There's no use in hiding. The smart treadmill knows you're home. You might as well go get your workout clothes on."

"No, Fred didn't run a TV marathon - He watched a marathon on TV."

'Gordorf, it's the fourth quarter. Get off your duff and wizard them a touch down already!'