Cost-cutting Connoisseur Gifts

How to do without

'I know the marketing budget is stretched...but I still think we need professional models!'

"The good news is we're going paperless. The bad news is it's the employee's bathrooms."

"As you can see, we've streamlined our office wellness program."

'Office' block tightening it's belt

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

The Complete Spaghetti Dinner.

"Post Covid it was clear that the old 9-5 was no longer viable, our industry lends itself to home working."

"I know we said we would get you a laptop.. but this will have to do until business gets better."

Janet always was ahead of the curve...she outsourced herself.

'If I'm going to do an effective job of reducing costs, I'm going to need a bigger budget.'

"I've been told to go through all our expenses...cut out any fat, get rid of any costly perks!"

'And finally, there's option three, a classic business model that would reduce our marketing, supply-chain and production expenses by 85 percent!' '

"You've got two more things to worry about now. You're mad and I'm expensive."

'I've just thought of a way to save the company £1800 a month.'

'What's the smallest budget you can manage on?'

"This wasn't the kind of budget cuts I had in mind."

'I hear your fees are very reasonable.'

'Haven't they ever heard of walls around here?'

'Look, mom...a bargain!'

"One day this will all be outsourced."

'I know you're trying to keep health care costs down - but what kind of life support systems are these?'

Thrift: bathe fully dressed and wash your clothes at the same time

'You've got to help me, Doc -- I keep switching long-distance companies!'

January Sales

'It says take all this medication - if you can afford it.'

"Could I have a bottle of the Chateau Lafitte '67 but filled with the wine from Tesco 2019."

Pay Hospital Bill Here

'Of course I care for you. You're the most expensive woman in my life.'

Cutting the cost of assisted living facilities

Children are pulled in cart privided by the school contingency fuel fund.

Political Polls, Inc: (Elevator): 'Up. Down, Undecided/don't know'

"If your insurance doesn't cover it, there's always the lottery."

"Is the drug that you are prescribing available as a generic, so I can save some money, or at the very least, available from a pharmaceutical company that I own shares in, so that I can make some money?"