Cosmic Travelers Gifts

"We came to your planet because there are just not enough pickleball courts on our planet."

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

"The stars were much more beautiful from Earth."

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

An alien in his space ship sees a space sign that says 'You are here'

Save Our Universe

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

"Before vaporizing this one, we need to file an environmental impact report."

"I didn't come all this way to do work."

'Dang, again we're going so fast that we caused a disruption in the time-space continuum.'

* Let's stop here, they seem nice!

'Hey, you! -- What happened to the pet dinosaurs we left here?'

"Oh well, at least it's not Earth."

He doesn't howl at the moon. He prefers to howl into the void.

Parking meter on the moon.

An alien dog hangs its head out the flying saucer.

An Alien on the Moon waiting for his Alien dog to finish Peeing.

"A trillion bottles of beer on the wall, a trillion bottles of beer..."

We've got to move closer to work. These 200 light year commutes are killing me.

'Gen-Xers in their retirement years.'

TV - MARS, weather: 'Very hot and dry days, bitterly cold nights and no precipitation for the next several million years!'

You're gonna have to put that thing in "UFO mode."

'Do you have 4G up here?'

"Disney will flip!"

"Last Year we went to Peoria."

"Ready. Aim. Pew! Pew!"

It says, 'Billions of Babies on Board.'

Life in the fastest lane.

"Oh yoo hoo, NASA, guess who found another rock! NASA? Baby, you there?"

"Are we there yet?"

"You were going 24,998 in a 24,955!"

'You do have catastrophic insurance, but it only applies in case of invasion from outer space.'