Cosmetic Guru Gifts

'You are right; it does appear to be some kind of a fungus.'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

The adoration of the gels.

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

Handbag store - "Perfect."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

'We live in difficult times. These underwear don't help one bit.'

'She's so put together!'

Dragon Hair-dryer.

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

A women in a shoeshop.

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

Rapunzel in the Morning

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

Dating is so expensive...

"Be creative...!"

Keeping warm.

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

Emergency Hipster Beard

"Absolutely not!"

"Too much concealer?"

"The derby is better. That makes you look like Abraham Lincoln."

"And now. . . which shoes?"

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!