Corporate Politics Enthusiast Pillows

Middle Management.

'Pay no attention to him. He's just a disgruntled former employee.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

The MBA Draft

"We have an acronym!"

"At this office no two days are different."

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

Parade of Businessmen

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

'The massive arrests have made the plans for downsizing much easier.'

'When training my son, keep him totally ignorant. I'm grooming him to be VP in-charge-of -denials.'

Not a surprise, coming from the new boss - who looks about 6 years old.

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

"At the end of the day, I always feel I could have shifted more blame."

"I think you might need to start again."

'Go to work, do your job, go home. . . Penburtson, that is the American Dream!'

'Remember - Reilly's Chairman of the Board, but Henderson's the Alpha male.'

'Underestimate him at your own risk. When he first came here, everybody laughed and said he didn't have a snowball's chance. Now he's our regional supervisor. Go figure!'

"The scowl might just be what this place needs."

"Nobody is to blame until we pick someone."

Scapegoat of the Year

"You haven't been laid off because you're the designated scapegoat."

"I know we're not lions, but let's call ourselves a pride anyway."

"I think we should try something a little simpler."

"Hank brings five years of top sales experience to our team so lets try to make him feel welcome as he makes you all look bad."

'Here you are, Simmons!'

"We don't have an exercise room here. You'll stay in shape by climbing the ladder, jumping through hoops, toeing the line..."