Corporate Politics Aficionado Pillows

"Apparently, I've been singled out for an important role. . . I've heard that I'm being sent to Coventry. . ."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

The MBA Draft

Sir Winston Churchill

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

"We have an acronym!"

"At this office no two days are different."

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

"Don't be sad, Bud. These decisions are so political."

Parade of Businessmen

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

'The massive arrests have made the plans for downsizing much easier.'

Not a surprise, coming from the new boss - who looks about 6 years old.

'When training my son, keep him totally ignorant. I'm grooming him to be VP in-charge-of -denials.'

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

"At the end of the day, I always feel I could have shifted more blame."

"I think you might need to start again."

Barack Obama, Angela Merkel and David Cameron are ecstatic about the possibility of a free trade agreement between the U.S. and the European Union.

'Go to work, do your job, go home. . . Penburtson, that is the American Dream!'

'Remember - Reilly's Chairman of the Board, but Henderson's the Alpha male.'

Scapegoat of the Year

"The scowl might just be what this place needs."

Idlib, Syria - The final stage