Corporate Politics Aficionado Gifts

"Apparently, I've been singled out for an important role. . . I've heard that I'm being sent to Coventry. . ."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

The MBA Draft

Sir Winston Churchill

'Being the boss's yes-man used to be easier. Now you also have to 'like' him on facebook, follow him on Twitter, link with him on linked-in...'

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"We have an acronym!"

"At this office no two days are different."

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

Parade of Businessmen

That's What Happens

"Don't be sad, Bud. These decisions are so political."

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

'The massive arrests have made the plans for downsizing much easier.'

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

'When training my son, keep him totally ignorant. I'm grooming him to be VP in-charge-of -denials.'

Not a surprise, coming from the new boss - who looks about 6 years old.

"At the end of the day, I always feel I could have shifted more blame."

"I think you might need to start again."

Barack Obama, Angela Merkel and David Cameron are ecstatic about the possibility of a free trade agreement between the U.S. and the European Union.

'Remember - Reilly's Chairman of the Board, but Henderson's the Alpha male.'

'Go to work, do your job, go home. . . Penburtson, that is the American Dream!'

"The scowl might just be what this place needs."

"I know we're not lions, but let's call ourselves a pride anyway."