Corporate Peacekeeper T-Shirts

'There goes JB, still unflappable.'

'And this is Ziggy, our stress management consultant...'

Easy big guy, easy,...no one's going to hurt you... - The Boss Whisperer

"Good boy."

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

"That's the last time I'm going to allow politics to be discussed in the office."

Wedding Day Itinerary.

The truth is, Congressman, we didn't know it was wrong to screw people.

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

HR - Helping Relationships

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

TPP - Investor State Dispute Settlement

'...and this time Gerald, don't refer to the RBS as the Ripoff Bonus Scheme!'

"I can't even remember what we were fighting about."

Human rights

"The session isn't quite going to plan."

The problem is, too many people aren't the least bit particular about their arrows.

Corporate Greed.

"World War III? Hmm. O.K., but, remember, nobody gets hurt."

Censorship? We Don't Do That Here.

"Do you ever have days when you can't seem to rise above petty politics?"

'There. See? Your buddy is OK. Now show us our guy before we make the swap.'

"Perhaps we got off on the wrong paw."

'So we're agreed: we'll go to mediation.'

'Don't forget to take your tranquilizers Daddy, little Jimmy is coming round to play.'

'How long have you been fighting?'

"This is our new head of conflict resolution."

State of the Union

'Negotiating skills need fine tuning.'

'We have to be forthright with the public. We have to have their confidence. We have to convince them we're working for the common good. Then we can invade their privacy.'

When the accounts department took the stationary cupboard Bob decided to book the Conflict Management course.

The World Pharmaceutical Corporation

The Arab Autumn