Corporate Finance Professional Gifts

'How are you getting on with the strategy for growth ?'

'Quick...follow that rainbow.'

“I can’t disagree, your methods are very creative. But… have you any practical accounting experience?”

'Daddy! For the last time, this is my wedding, not a 'spin-off'!'

'Give him a chance...he's still new to the job.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

'Now that I have your attention...'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'Let's not go by the book.'

Killer Executive Suits.

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

Profit

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

"Third quarter numbers were good after we cut our global workforce three to two."

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

Spot the difference.

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

"Obviously some people here don't appreciate the gravity of our situation."

Doug had trouble getting home at a decent hour.

"We're experienced an extraordinary amount of growth this year."

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."