Corny Joke Fan Gifts

"The genetically modified corn wants us to knock it off with the crop circles."

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Sphinx cat and mummy mouse

The Brothers Grime

10 K Tail-Chase

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

"Technically, it's a mammal."

'Rollin', rollin', rollin',...keep them dogies rollin'...'

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

The Snooze Bar.

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

Beer Parasol.

Winter Weather.

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

'Joe has been partying hard!'

"I fell to the ground from a height of about two metres when I was born: My very first stunt!"

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

F&E Stables. Horses Boarded. The owner of this horse is a huge fan of the late musician, "Prince." That explains the purple reins.

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

"Well, you were late and her boyfriend didn't turn up for their wedding, so....."

tRUMp, Pirate President

No, I don

'Too many people in our state are overweight, Senator. They want fat-free pork.'

'You're one of my kids? Really? I'm so sorry, I have so many it's hard to remember them all...'

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

"Mom, are you sure I'm not adopted?"

"Fish finder."

'Bob, wait!!! Nice try, bear.'

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

'All she said was something about having rice for dinner and then poof!. . . She's gone!'