Cool Cruiser T-Shirts

"After you build your lowrider, we're gonna look cool cruising the boulevard! When did you get your driver's license?"

Mr. Punch in Venice

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

'It's St Patrick's Day...I thought you called this car your lucky charm??!'

'I was just beginning to think about my portfolio. Now you're telling me to rethink it.'

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

"How long have you felt like a three-masted schooner?"

"Balance is essential, Ray. For example, this week, my life is purpost-driven, and I'll follow that with seven days of aimless drifting!"

"I'm looking for a car with backseat performance."

Extreme skier flies through cloud.

"I'd rather be at the office."

'I've never eaten here. I come for the broadband.'

'I realize you love my boat, but you've been on it for nearly a month now. Do me a favor and go home.'

Playboy has rigged his car with a loveseat

Fighting Gondoliers.

Bargeman on a canal boat.

"Over the river and through a ridiculous detour that has us in the middle of who-knows-where, to Grandfather’s house we go!"

'My wife insisted I stop and ask someone for directions. Could you just pretend you're giving them to me?'

Sports car.

Now Entering Wyoming (or one of those other rectangular states that are out west someplace).

Mount Rushmore waves back to tourists.

Somewhere In France...The Watsons have just discovered that English is not the universal language after all.

Slow, merge left, resume speed, stop, stay, sit, roll over, good boy!

'It's very nice, but it's not really me. Do you have any of those little round, hollow, plastic balls?'

"We didn't know you had a rush hour."

Winter Roadwork...

'Good news... I got the venue changed to Florida.'

'I didn't always want to be a gondolier. My first love was the Church.'

"Imagine yourself: driving up the coast, the top down, tears streaming down your face because your wife had no choice but to kick you out, this time for good."

"With my handicap I can park just about anywhere I want to!"

Ignore him he's just showing off