Cooking Comedy Enthusiast Gifts

Le Bolshie Chef.

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

Cook and her Maids

'I told you not to complain about the hospital food!'

"I pray that he will enjoy my pie..." "The smell's enough to make me cry!"

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

'Say, Hon. . . the pizza's burning.'

"Not tonight. Margie wants to watch some guy deep fry a duck on cable."

"Then add one extra large egg..."

'Anybody for breakfast?'

"We need a new stove. This one's beginning to burn oil."

Linda discovers she had just baked the wrong ziti

Luigi's Career Change From Pizza Shop Owner to Masseuse Goes Smoothly...

"It'll never be ready in time."

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

...If sauce has not begun to thicken after 10 minutes, pour contents back into can and wait for your wife to get home.

'Not now, you'll spoil your dinner.'

"Holy smoke. What kind of frosting is that?"

Deviled HamDeviled Eggs.

'I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.' (chef shaking chicken).

'Todays special - egg on Ronay'

'I hope it's okay -- the cookbook had some really confusing abbreviations.'

"Maybe I haven't suffered enough. Why don't you whip up some of your curried pork balls and refried rice for dinner?"

'...now pour the mixture into a baking dish...'

Great Moments in Culinary History.

'Too much salt!'

'No, no... I ordered a tart, not a tort!'

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

Road Kill Cafe.

"1 pinch of salt, 3 pinches of baking soda...oh dear, a cup of flour? How many pinches is that?"