Conversational Comedians Gifts

The Nanuit Have 2,027 Words For Snow, But, After Awhile, They Just Talk About Something Else...

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

"Do you think Trump has read 'Contemporary Relativism and the Death of Meaning'?"

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

Football Delivery

"Oh, don't mind us. We boo everybody."

"...and another thing...stop referring to me as user-friendly"

"Kevin's job as a train announcer seriously affected his love-life..."

'Human resources gave us the idea of trying 'blind interviewing'...'

Memory Foam Mattress.

"I'm disabling autocorrect, because it reminds me too much of my mother-in-law."

"Are you talking to me?"

Fencing Venn Graph

Modern animal communication

'-and to all you night owls out there...'

"My wife's career is in ruins... She's an archaeologist!"

Parking validation

"I see by your resume that you've got a big problem with formatting."

Text in a bottle

"The face of the pear-shaped man reminded me of the mashed turnips that Aunt Mildred used to serve alongside the Thanksgiving turkey. As he got out of the strawberry-hued car, his immense fists looked like two slabs of slightly gnawed ham. He waddled over

Conversation Topics and Guidelines Approved for this Area...

“That’s not the nuclear football That’s my gym bag.”

'It's all about hunting and killing with you, isn't it? Why can't you just have fun in the woods?'

What the critics are saying about Hell.

"You know how last year you told me you'd teach me how to pick up ladies?"

Scavenenger's hunt.

"Are you a yes man or a no man?"

"My humour needs bringing up to date. Do you think the New School might have something?"

'The feedback on the extended opening hours was generally excellent, although some people feel we should provide croissants and coffee in the morning and a little late supper in the evening.'

'That will be fine, go ahead and book - it'll just take a couple of days for me to convince him that it was his idea.'

"We cannot serve meals on the plane because you cannot take your mask off to eat... So we are only selling our snacks."

"Look, I'm trying to say something here, can you stop butting in?"

'My grandma sent her first text to me. She used only vowels.'