Convenience Gifts

Drive Thru Blood Donor Clinic.

'I hope it's fixed soon. I miss the convenience and friendly beep.'

Drive-in fast food, drive-in bank and drive-in car park.

"I just dialed 1-800-BAGUETTE."

"Press this red button and it will order up a take-away pizza."

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

'Yeah, my phone folds out into a TV tray.'

"A self-cleaning oven? Can I get a self-cleaning room?"

"In my day we walked to the litter box."

24-hour hot dog machine

"Here's your food delivery, you bone-idle bastard."

"Ambitions... To live next door to a Chinese takeaway."

"That one is non-wash. Also no ironing is required."

24 hour hot dog machine

"I've changed my mind about multiple fanny packs. I'm going back to cargo shorts."

"I can't be bothered to hunt tonight, lets just open a tin"

'I think it's just a little too convenient.'

When Anteaters Get Lazy

'Let's face it - home shopping catalogues are marketed at old people...' - '...but with a bit of lateral thinking they could easily target busy young professionals.' - 'These 'bathing wipes', for example, mean I can now wash my lower half on the way to wo

'Chew each bite ten times? †I'm a busy man!'

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

'I sent out for everything.'

It's my last chance

Exit. My problem is restaurants have drive-throughs, and fitness centers don't.

Drive-in dentist.

"... with a side of brown rice, right. And can the delivery guy stop at the pharmacy and pick up my prescription?"

La-z-house

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

Bookworm Sleepover

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

Pet a Puppy

"Wheel, schmeel—check these babies out!"

Keeping warm.

Lumbar support animal