"Now this is our standard company contract - I want you to stick in a couple of loopholes."
Contract Negotiations Gifts
Navigating contract negotiations can be stressful, but adding a touch of humor can make the process more bearable. Explore our collection of clever and amusing items like mugs, t-shirts, pillows, and prints that are ideal for lawyers, business professionals, or anyone dealing with negotiations. These products are designed to bring a smile during tough talks and celebrate the art of bargaining with wit.
'Hang on!...You don't expect me to swallow that as well!'
"Goes to show ou can't please all of the people all of the time!"
"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."
"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"
Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.
"Here's what I'm gonna do."
I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....
'When we get there let me do the double talking.'
'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'
'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'
UK/US Free Trade Deal
'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'
"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."
'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'
"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"
"Well, it looks like the merger is off."
"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."
'Mr. Dawson, about when I said 'don't pull any punches'...'
'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'
'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'
'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.
'Try and be negative in a positive way.'
"What if he's bluffing? What if he's not? What if the room just gets too hot?"
SALE
Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.
'Pick a contract...any contract!'
'Upset at you for breaching the non-compete? Of course not.'
'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'
'Gentlemen, I've been authorized to sweeten the offer.'
'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'
'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'
'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'
Mayhem, Inc. Part 21
Changing Minds
Contract Negotiations Gifts Collection
Contract Negotiations Mugs
Explore our range of mugs featuring witty and funny contract negotiation designs—ideal for lawyers, negotiators, or anyone who appreciates humor on their coffee breaks.
Contract Negotiations Pillows
Add a humorous splash to your space with pillows printed with jokes and quotes about contract negotiations—comfortable and amusing.
Contract Negotiations Prints
Decorate your office with prints that celebrate the humor in negotiations. Perfect for lawyers and business pros who enjoy a good laugh.
Contract Negotiations T-Shirts
Find t-shirts that showcase your negotiation wit with hilarious and clever designs—perfect for professionals and dealmakers who love to keep it light.