Considering Fertility Treatments Gifts

"How much were you thinking of spending?"

"I guess for me family planning is just a study in fertility."

Radiology, Cardiology and Fertility Clinic.

"Have you considered trying for a puppy?"

"Leapfrog is the latest craze among the kids, but experts say it contribute to declining birthrates. Find out why � after the break!"

"You need to stop pressing the snooze button on your biological clock."

Man leaves sperm bank. Woman says: 'Thanks, do come again.'

IVF assessment centre.

"It's perfect for starting a family."

Pregnancy Test

"So, how long have you been trying?"

Fertility clinic open day - Man holding balloons shaped like sperm.

Three Parent Baby

'My wife and I can't have dogs!'

Fertility Clinic - "Who wants to be mother?"

"We can make you more pregnant than you ever though possible."

'And for Pete's sake, let's cut out out all this artificial insemination.'

"If you're so worried about the effect of your mobile phone on your sperm count maybe you should just use it less!"

'And once we transfer the embryo, aspirate the follicles, and align your ovulation with the doctor's gold schedule, voila -- natures little miracle.'

Fertility Center.

'I warned you that the fertility drugs might have side effects.'

'Don't take this the wrong way, but these pills you have to take come in a child-proof bottle.'

"Just for variety, Doc, next time let's insert the embryos doggy style."

'Last one in is a rotten egg.'

You're expecting twins. What! I wanted a least triplets!

"First, the good news; you're not sterile."

Science and mothers day

"In brief, we'll stimulate your ovaries with daily medications or hormones, perform an oocyte retrieval at the hospital, incubate the eggs in a petri dish at the laboratory, and then sit back and let nature take its course"

'Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?'

'I'm sorry Mrs Jones, but according to these results your womb is extremely inhospitable, and your husband's sperm is gay.'

"Whoever she is...she's one hell of an egg donor."

'We can now offer you a free range egg option.'

'I'm sorry to inform you, Mrs. Cottontail, you're out of eggs.'

Minority Group Access To Assisted Reproduction.

"Great news! Your sperm count is dangerously low!"