Conservative Parents Pillows

'We'd better get down on all fours now -- my parents are the conservative type.'

"Anachronism or not, it just ain't the fourth without the ribs and Willie Nelson."

'Baby's first two-step.'

"Study her closely...the laughing eyes, the dimpled smile...she's got 'em right where she wants 'em."

"He looks just like your husband."

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

Do you go for Hannity or O'Reilly? Tough call. O'Reilly's presence is so big, fearless. Whereas Hannity has a wicked fast tongue and such inner strength. As symbolized externally by his jawline. O'Reilly is so tall. Something strange is happening. Coulter's a bit masculine for my tastes. Ditto. HOJ.

'You can't start them exercising too early.'

Dating The Daughter Of A Hockey Goalie

'Go forth and multiply!'

Tea Party and the US economy

'You can stop looking-I just remembered I didn't wear my retainer today. Funny, huh?'

Two parent snakes measuring the growth pattern of their young one across the wall.

'He has my eyes and his father's neck tie.'

'He said his first buzz word today!'

"Seriously, the way you rasied me it's no wonder I can't get a gig in a real night club."

"Sweet dreams, Tim." "Mort Feldstein: Loving father and professional clown."

Rishi Sunak

The first attempt at stoning St. Stephen...

Assisted pregnancy for same sex couples

"Look. He's just created his first text output object."

"You see it as half full, I see his diaper as half empty."

They moved the bus stop further away. Ok. Where is it? "OK"?! They expect me to let my little babies walk 3 whole blocks! Umm

"Way to go, son."

'Your honor, we find the defendant not guilty, but we sure wouldn't let our daughters go out with him!'

'While you were in the hospital having our fullback, uh...firstborn, I decorated this room.'

"She's growing up so fast! Already she's texting and not paying attention."

Customer Relationship Management at Surf City Hospital

Parents dressing children in protective gear in order to play conkers.

Mother Planet: 'Oh oh QUICK Honey,look Little JARRED'S trying to Orbit'

Scottish Baby

"The baptism is Sunday, and not a moment too soon, I might add."

Parental pride.

"I kept dropping my phone and cracking the screen. So, my parents bought me a thicker cover."