Conscious Capitalists Gifts

A Daily Prescription for Politically-Correct Conspicuous Consumers.

"Good For You / Bad For You"

...And he calls himself the 'Green' Giant...

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"This is locally grown and good for the environment, but it may give you greenhouse gas."

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

'Do you ever think about how we can reduce our global footprint?'

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

'The U.S. has less than 5% of the world's population, but consumes 25% of its natural resources. Pretty outrageous, isn't it?'

Supermarket Aisles: 'Good for the Environment' and 'Couldn't give a flying F@$#! about the environment!'

"To mediate properly, you need a mantra. How about 'Ka-Ching'?"

"And once we wipe out the disease, where does that leave us?"

ONE MORNING WHILE GETTING DRESSED,

"I, too, hate being a greedy bastard, but we have a responsibility to our shareholders."

The scales between gluttony and hunger

'Yes, the wood on this pencil is from a renewable source.'

The Climate Change Debate Explained

"He can't speak to you at the moment - he's bonding with his compensation package."

'Of course, I buy only organic foods... I like to be environmentally friendly.'

Large cap funds

"You can take it with you down here - but no social conscience funds."

"Do you have anything with FOOD in it?"

Horn of Plenty.

Amputee watches wealthy man who has a spare set of legs.

"Are your chickens raised without the use of growth hormones?"

Where Pleather Comes From

An apple a day!

"I got rich through hard work." "Whose?"