Connoisseurs Of Comedy Gifts

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'He likes to power nap.'

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Night of the Latkes

1847 - Bram Stoker, creator of Dracula was born in Dublin.

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

Farm Humor.

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

Happy Hour

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

The Trojan Beagle.

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the heck else are you talking... you talking to me?"

The Snarky District

10 Good Things about a Minnesota Winter.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

Emergency Phone.

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'Satchel, I have just had a revelation.'

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

Bangers and Mash