Confused Applicant Gifts

'You'll need a better credit rating before we can give you a credit card?'

The Lion, the witch and the flat-pack self-assembly wardrobe: lion and witch putting a wardrobe together.

'And I see you've listed opposable thumbs as your greatest asset...'

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

"So what makes you think you're the man for the job?"

I think you'll appreciate my resume. It's printed on a fridge magnet.

"Hey, there's Sara, padding her college-entrance résumé!"

'We're looking for someone to liven up our Monday morning job meetings. Can you handle it Chuckles?'

'I let my merit badges do the talking.'

'Smith, where exactly did you get your experience in 'Hedge Fund Management'?'

What do you think of the application so far?

"Hi Mom...do you remember in which grade I was given an award for my excellent performance of the song about little ducks?"

'Wrong number. Sorry, I dialled my salary by mistake.'

Bureaucratic Position Interview

',,,and you can name your salary as long as it falls within our range of underpaid employees,'

True, I've seen plenty of padded resumes, but very few bejeweled resumes.

Philosophers studying meta-physical chemistry.

Left and Right: Please be consistent.

'You'll be hearing from us! Hello?'

"Start Monday...I like the cut of your jib, young man"

"I see we're all going into this interview a little superstitious."

"Cheer up, Nicole! What does Princeton know? Say, you got any plans for that last bit of cobbler?"

"I had a dream that I was awake and trying to sleep and now I don't know what's going on."

'I admit I copied all my essays from the internet.'

"Any other strengths?"

NCAA Applications

'Could you help me? My parents are lost.'

"We can still be friends, right?"

Man panicing because woman has washed his money filled shorts

'Hey, lady...this application wants me to PRINT my name but OBVIOUSLY I don't carry my PRINTER with me!'

"Boy, you really know how to mess up a guy's resume."

She'll probably get in through clearing.

"Here, we want movers, but not shakers."

'I'm sorry, Mr.Nesbitt - but there's no accounting for taste.'

"We're in our lab coats. Now what?"