Conference Connoisseurs T-Shirts

'I wonder if TED ever listens.'

"Just one more site!" "I'm totally, like, in control!" "I can quit anytime I feel like it..."

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

"But I see you're having difficulty following my argument."

GPC needs to make its new formula foolproof.

Men gossiping

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

'Who's the new guy?'

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

Counselor. It's annoying that he always has to have the second-to-last word

I'd like to talk about absenteeism.

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

'Would the person who's inhaling the very life out of this meeting please stop it right now?'

'He has a very open mind. Everything goes in one ear and out the other.'

"I said, you know why women talk more than men?" "What?" "I said, you know why women talk more than men..." "What?"

"We should probably talk about the elephant in the Roomba."

'I need to appear bold and decisive. Won't someone PLEASE ask me a yes or no question?'

"I was really impressed by the way you sent back the wine, though it did come in second to the waiter's uppercut."

White Wine Wisdom (2)

Can I ask you a question, man-to-man? Sure, little buddy. What do "man-to-man talks" usually consist of? What? I've never really had one, I don't think. What usually goes into them? Sports? Shaving? Carburetors? A little of this, a little of that. There's a proper ratio, of course. I'm not good at math.

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

Conclave.

Bookshop: Our Bestsellers - Empty Phrases

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

"Remember this? One sweetheart of a deal!"

"Well, for starters, Matt has been showing definite improvement in risk-taking."

'I'm afraid turn out isn't as high as we'd expected...three of them misheard the date, five got the time wrong and everyone from marketing went to a hotel in Norwich by mistake.'

The End of the Worker Bees

Due to obsessive and intrusive attention by the Media, this news conference will be cancelled

"NOBODY LISTENS ANYMORE."

"Hold that afterthought!"