Computer Language Artist Gifts

'This is truly one of the great poems in the language. Computerese, that is.'

Polly txt speak

Shampoo.

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"Darn autocorrect!"

How a poet works

'Es-yay. E's-hay ere-hay ight-ray ow-nay and-ay e-hay oesn't-day uspect-say a ing-thay!'

Wordplay: Nonstarter.

Strawberry Shake

"They don't appear to want to take over. They just want to dance."

"Monsieur has just ordered a vasectomy..."

'Sorry for calling them 'graphics', Mr. Burke. I meant the 'colored pictures'.'

'A frore basenji was mistaken for a stabile.'

Primate Speech Institute. He's learned to talk, but all he'll talk about is the price of bananas.

Master Artists' Computer Graphics: da Vinci's 'The Robot Body.'

Excess Baggage: If you can draw, you don't have to know the local language.

"It's a stream of consciousness novel like 'Ulysses' I just sort of sat down and wrote it without even thinking of a plot have you had drink I', going to get a seat where do you come from it's hot in here I like blue do you like blue..."

He's celebrating finishing the last page of his novel...now he only has the other 468 to write.

Adjusted sales pitch: 'Congratulations! You may already be a non-winner.'

"The creative writing part is that I've created new ways to spell words."

Despot!

"The disciples are gonna be totally freaked."

'Our customer service was lousy, but from now on, we'll give the personal touch. Let's write to 'Hey lassies and dudes, what's up?'

Auditioning for Finnegans Wake.

The Man Who Couldn't Say "When."

"It's a new word I created. I'm still working on a new definition for it."

"'I sent this to you through the mail to say I hope your day is swell.' What's wrong with that?"

Writers's Block - Temporary/Permanent.

'But you're the one who told me to learn one new word every day.'

Text Speak

The Canada Geese decide to travel way down south for winter.

Fair and Square

"These days even perfomance art is digital"

"I think your Arabic is coming along fine for your trip to Casablanca, with or without the Humphrey Bogart impression."

"My Soul belongs to the Computer."