Computer Geek Gifts

'Burnout' (head exploded).

'And he thinks I'm slow!'

'It's a foolproof computer network, sir, that no one can break into, not even a kid.'

'It's a Microsoft patch. It will help stop your addiction to PCs.'

"If there's a way in, they'll find it."

"Have you tried turning it off and throwing it out the window?"

Sadly, the few who actually checked their e-mail, were too out of shape to run.

'We conscientiously backed up everything, except the tech who knows how to restore the backup.'

'All these delays...a thousandth of a second here, a millionth of a second there. We'll have to get the darn thing fixed.'

'He's a visionary.'

>Enter new password: BEEF STEW >Password not stroganoff.

Initially excited about the possibilities of email, God lost interest when he discovered someone was already using his favorite screen name.

"Oh no, we need Tech Support!"

"To retrieve password: Please answer your secret question, which is, 'what is your password?' hahahaha!"

'Hello, technical support? Which one is the 'any key'?'

"...and in here we just let the computers get on with it."

Man pouring glue into a printer.

'A computer for your birthday? -- Do you think apples grow on trees?'

'I'm a mac - you're a PC. I'm sorry...we're just not compatible.'

'I'm sorry but something's wrong with this computer's smell checker.'

'Then a window popped up and asked, 'Are you sure you want to empty trash?' I shouldn't have clicked 'okeydokey.''

'We've given up on anti-virus software in favour of this!'

'This won't hurt a byte...'

Knights of the Square Table.

Bill Gates final moment...

'It's about to restart.'

'How could Homer write The Iliad and The Odyssey with a quill pen on parchment when I can't write a memo with a computer?'

'The computer is down! The computer is down!'

'Last week, he tried to give me a PC.'

"Where's that damn 'escape' key?"

'The only problem with having a laptop is you need a lap!'

'If he wasn't in a 12-step program he wouldn't get any exercise at all.'

protecting keyboard from drink

Natural Stupidity is no match for Artificial Intelligence.

Dog at computer screen initiates a search for master's slippers.