Computer Game Strategist Pillows

'These online fantasy worlds are great fun. I can be ‘Dave the Accountant' from Birmingham.'

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

Little league world series of poker.

Putin and Zelensky

"Mr Frimley will see you now."

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

"My hackers just collapsed your country's economy."

"I'd say this pair of sixes beats your hand."

'I was in a camouflage unit, so this one is for Hide and Seek.'

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

'Now I know why the strategy guide warned against entering the 5th stage. Awesome!'

Sweep the board.

Funky Facts: Football.

"This is Blackjack, come in Yahtzee."

'How about a game of cards?'

"Steady. This is going to be so sweet."

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

Some card-game puns

"I don't understand it! My nerd detector's going crazy!"

'He's refusing to die as a protest against Inheritance Tax.'

Personal conker trainer.

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

"... It's just that, when you said you had a couple of tickets to see the big game..."

Trojan Hurdler.

Hockey Season.

"You moved two spaced and then one space to the side? Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that sure sounds illegal."

'I'm moving up to be Chairperson-of-the-board. One of you will be President.' (Men have fencing swords).

"Our focus group will butcher your focus group."

'What are we, wimps? Are we gonna let a bunch of rabbits push us all over the field? Come on, big guys.'

"Okay, I'll renew your contract and raise you five sick days."

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

Sales - "Any other suggestion besides getting a bigger chart?"