Compliance Nerd Gifts

'Run this by 'Legal,' but sprint it by 'Ethics.''

All items year zero compliant

'Please leave the light on, dear. I'm afraid there might be OSHA inspectors under the bed.' 'Managers at Night.'

"The sign ruins our surprise attack, but it's a big OSHA fine if we don't have it."

'...And they're giving us sixty million years to get in compliance.'

'He's an attorney. He came with the software package, to verify software licensing compliance.'

Obama's Financial Reform Pill: I hope they won't need a glass of water.

Beware of the Legislation

"Uh oh, here come more regulations."

'There's no need for confusion. Part 935 of Mining Regulation 823, Section 323 in Article L clearly states . . . '

"Son, you're old enough now to learn about something we call 'compliance'...."

'I need someone to fill my shoes and be in them when the SEC come calling.'

'Federal Bureau of Technological Compliance - May I help you?'

'I'm feeling down, too - Why don't we pass some feel-good legislation?'

"Never forget...if you bend a law enough, it becomes a loophole!"

'I am prosecuting you for a breach of article 5 of the explosives act, storing black powder in a dangerous manor on unlicensed premises.'

Boss talking to lawyer, 'These new Terms and Conditions you've drafted for us are extremely long and overly complex - our customers are never going to be able to understand them. Well done Jones!'

'He's the most important man here - He writes the compliance procedures for the DEPARTMENT of Compliance!'

'Building Inspectors During Their Off Hours.'

'You're a spineless, craven, frightened little man, Bradberg - I like that in an employee.'

"Welcome to the building, Mrs. Bergdorf. We'd like to go over the condo's rules with you."

European Union versus Big Tech

'We could have a problem here lads.'

'Shouldn't take long for your new fitting, Sir.'

'The FSA is keen on new ways to get it's message across...'

"Hold on. To avoid getting sued, I'll have to run it by legal."

'A regulatory body is here to see you!'

Desk Organizers: 'Comply with Government Regulations and Guidelines.'

'Ms Wayne, check with the legal department. Why must we obey the rules?'

'I love being a building inspector.'

This is a RED TAPE production Area.

"Then we'll just mark it 'Do not shake before using'."

Man with health and safety clipboard follows the Olympic Torch relay.

'According to this, you're out of compliance with EVERYTHING!'

EU versus Android