Complaint Comedians Gifts

Minnesota Weather.

Whine Bar

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

Flyfishing for dummies.

"I plan to read the constitution this weekend. Is it long?"

"There's a programme about people watching TV on the other channel."

'I know it's difficult to stay in compliance, with everything, Ferguson, but this is ridiculous!'

'I don't like to complain, Evelyn, but aren't these family reunions getting out of hand?'

"You say that life is suffering, but isn't it also complaining?"

'Hello, Room Service?'

Great literary festival heckles.

"While a cure for curiosity remains elusive, it continues to take a deadly toll."

'There's supposed to be 56 million bubbles in a bottle of Champagne -- I only counted 54, 325,775.'

Father and son watching a TV sitcom

"What makes you think you can patronize me?"

'Hey, maybe you need to work on your writing goodlymoreshun.'

'So there's a fly in your beer — why begrudge a fellow creature a little happiness?'

But the brochures says breakfast in bed! Yes, only if you carry your bed down to the dining room!

'You have a complaint about your taxes? That will be a 50 cent complaint tax.'

'No, I'm still standing in this stupid line looking at the back of somebody's stupid head.'

Complain to a bear

"You're doing it wrong."

“That’s not the nuclear football That’s my gym bag.”

"I'm not sure that lifting the remote control is what they meant by 'taking exercise'!"

Scavenenger's hunt.

"This Subway Diet is way better than that Atkins nonsense."

"I killed him in self-defense. I'm not good at accepting criticism."

'How sweet, they're playing 'Doctors and Nurses.''

'The bloke from downstairs has come to complain about the noise.'

Worm complaints desk

"It won't come back up!"

'The four scariest words in the English language.'

'You'd thing that the least he would do while we're gone is to paint the place!'

Sex education

'That's not yours. . . that coloring book belongs to the dentist's waiting room.'