Company Sage Gifts

'Do you think you can turn the company around without making us all dizzy?'

The day the stock market went UP.

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

'We consult those with whom we agree, which is why I rarely consult my conscience.'

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

'This software package can cut your workload in half. Do you want to purchase two copies?'

Music producers.

Sales Chart Through Ceiling

"Sinclair's not all he's cracked up to be. His reputation exceeds him."

"Intrapreneuring chief- how about a glass on the house?"

"Welcome aboard - That'll be your work station over there."

'I've noticed that no matter how busy you are, you are never too busy to stop an talk about how busy you are.'

"Your test results are back. We're going to have to remove your appendix and your wallet."

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

"It just happens...one day you wake up and you find that your best billable hours are behind you."

"I make money, therefore I am."

"This is part of the privatisation I don't like."

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

'Today the Dow finally outpaced the Jones.'

"Successful leadership involves more than just shouting at people."

'I can feel it, Henderson - Someone out there is up to no good.'

"Don't worry Sir, you're not the first person to ask for a refund and you probably won't be the last!"

'It's all right, Dad -- it's a Buddhist chat room!'

"Why would YOU want to know the meaning of life?"

Gawk

'And in further economic news, the silver lining in the latest economic crisies has been downgraded to bronze.'

"She died doing what she loved."

"How come you have your name on your desk, and I get my name on my chest?"

'I don't need a rewards program for my customers, as much as I do a blind faith program for them.'

"Well the good news is that the new software analysed hundreds of thousands of potential customers to identify any that would have a genuine interest in the product. . ."

'Found it ... Good heavens! It's the size of a soccer ball!..'