Commuting Satirist T-Shirts

Tortoise is snail taxi.

'I used to commute. Now I transform.'

'I use my Blackberry all the time to check the competition's executive bonuses.'

"Take me home now!"

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

"I dreamed last night that I had a job within walking distance."

'Then, to stop the spread, they burned the village and sent me home.'

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

Beep' 'beep' 'beep' 'beep'' - 'Slam!' - 'Great... another long week of pain and humiliation ahead...' - ''Click'' - 'God, Ilove my job.' - '' -

Martian Rovers find proof of intelligent life on the red planet.

Trapeze artists commuting

Things Women Never Say: 'Sorry I'm late boss. I was talking to my husband and he wouldn't stop listening.'

Traffic Lights Medicine

Honey I'm Home

Need a Lawyer?

65. Whenever I'm in the mood to watch the rest of the world go by, I simply keep to the legal speed limit.

Metrocard error messages

Lex Ave Express

"Due to unforeseen circumstances, there will be no delays on the subway today."

Penguin at work with zebra and lion says: 'The commute is killing me.'

",,,These job cuts will not affect patient care...."

'Turn right at the first $4.09 unleaded, then a hang a left at $4.03 unleaded, and over the bridge, past the $4.01 unleaded...'

Bumper sticker reads: 'I'd rather be text messaging.'

"...He's been going to work in a wheelie bin. He says its quicker, cleaner and less cramped"

'I don't like this. . .'

"It's the wrong type of tracks on the snow."

Bus Stop Evolution

"I have found a house in your price range, but it will be a long commute every day from Greenland."

Metro North Entrance: Closed because it's broken.

'This one's a hood ornament. I got it for carpooling.'

"Me, it's not a shower I crave for after a hard day at work, it's a long, long, long bath..."

Being vertically challenged, I never realized my dream of becoming a pro basketball player. But on a trip to work, it was just like I was a hoops star! I spilled some coffee when walking. I dribble whenever my feet are in motion. I took a selfie when I stopped at the ATM - it was a nice bank shot. Then as I neared the office, I came down the lane - and made an impressive display of driving and dunking. I should be getting a big shoe sponsorship contract any day now!

Cops on trains: 'Is that a truncheon, or are you just pleased to see me?'

'Trouble is, I only want to wear them for cycling to work.'

'I'll fix you! But Good!'