Commuting Commentator Gifts

'Do you remember when cycle paths were called pavements?'

Ants dressed as businessmen going to work.

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

Another Filibuster from the Secretary of the Interior of My Car

'Thanks for flying in for the meeting.'

'I was hoping traffic would ease up after the polar ice cap melted.'

March of the penguins.

"Take me home now!"

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

"I dreamed last night that I had a job within walking distance."

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

'Back in 1956 you were the youngest Briton to cover the Hungarian uprising. You are presently writing your memoirs in Sardinia. First question: how do you feel about the sorry state the London Underground is in?'

Trapeze artists commuting

Martian Rovers find proof of intelligent life on the red planet.

Beep' 'beep' 'beep' 'beep'' - 'Slam!' - 'Great... another long week of pain and humiliation ahead...' - ''Click'' - 'God, Ilove my job.' - '' -

The Enemies Within? They're the Boys in Blue

Things Women Never Say: 'Sorry I'm late boss. I was talking to my husband and he wouldn't stop listening.'

Honey I'm Home

Need a Lawyer?

65. Whenever I'm in the mood to watch the rest of the world go by, I simply keep to the legal speed limit.

I Love This Job...Its Just The Commuting I can't Stand.

Metrocard error messages

"Due to unforeseen circumstances, there will be no delays on the subway today."

Theme Park 'n' Ride

Penguin at work with zebra and lion says: 'The commute is killing me.'

'Remind me not to carpool with Paul again.'

'Turn right at the first $4.09 unleaded, then a hang a left at $4.03 unleaded, and over the bridge, past the $4.01 unleaded...'

"...He's been going to work in a wheelie bin. He says its quicker, cleaner and less cramped"

'This one's a hood ornament. I got it for carpooling.'

Sticker: 'How's my driving you nuts?'

"It's the wrong type of tracks on the snow."

Metro North Entrance: Closed because it's broken.

'I don't like this. . .'

Being vertically challenged, I never realized my dream of becoming a pro basketball player. But on a trip to work, it was just like I was a hoops star! I spilled some coffee when walking. I dribble whenever my feet are in motion. I took a selfie when I stopped at the ATM - it was a nice bank shot. Then as I neared the office, I came down the lane - and made an impressive display of driving and dunking. I should be getting a big shoe sponsorship contract any day now!

'Trouble is, I only want to wear them for cycling to work.'