Community Meetings Gifts

Allotment owners AGM - 'Rhubarb, rhubarb,rhubarb,...'

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

A crowd of happy pet owners.

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"Let's start with an icebreaker..."

"The meeting will come to order."

"I need to see your budget proposal."

"Where do we put Desserts?"

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

'Ah, Galagher, we made good use of your proposal.'

Social distancing

'That last meeting was a complete turn-off.'

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

"I'll wait a moment for everyone's energy drink to kick in."

"It's been moved that we adjourn for an afternoon nap. Is there a second?"

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

"Mr. Johnson, Bob is kicking me under the table!"

"A dozen eggs and a pint of semi-skimmed...Sorry, looks like I left my presentation in my other coat."

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"