Communion Contemplator T-Shirts

'I think I just blew my diet. Do you know what the glycemic index is for a communion host?'

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

'I'm not afraid of commitment, but forever is a really long time.'

"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

"Shall we put it in play?"

Lazy man contemplates the moment of creation.

'I just can't keep up with the conversations in deep space.'

"I let go of all my earthly attachments, but there's one I can't seem to shake."

Caterpillar Paranoia

'What? -- I send you all this great sunlight, and you waste it growing PROTOPLASM?'

"While Covid is still our top story scientists remain focused on Earth's pending collision with Jupiter."

"I'm afraid it's 'I do' ... not 'Undo'."

Beware of a first kiss that speaks volumes.

'Do you realize it takes over 2000 laws to enforce the ten commandments?'

'Since the universe is rapidly expanding, there's a lot more that we have to worry about now.'

'To become ONE with the Universe, you must first become COMPLIANT with the Universe!'

"Flat-earthers and round-earthers reach a compromise."

"My job is not as easy as it looks: You have to learn about astronomy and celestial mechanics to be able to accurately predict sunrise and sunset..."

"I forget - are we a species that mates for life?"

Apocalipsis

Man reading magazine: 'International Procrastinator.'

"Go forth and multiply under the constraint of sustainability within Nature's framework? What the heck is THAT supposed to mean?"

"This human experiment has gone on long enough. Give the hippos control."

"I should've done this years ago. All the good ones got taken."

'Do you promise to love,honor and cherish -- until one of you decides to become a 'free agent'?'

"Totality was great, but now that it's over I'm like, 'What am I even doing?'"

Echoes - 'Hellooooo'.

'All the girls say the same thing. You're a sweet guy, but...'

"I don't want a divorce, but I would like a gap year."

'How about bearing false witness for you neighbor?'

'Hey, don't look at me -- I was AGAINST free will.'

"I wonder if there's life as we know it on other planets."