Communion Contemplator Gifts

'I think I just blew my diet. Do you know what the glycemic index is for a communion host?'

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

'I'm not afraid of commitment, but forever is a really long time.'

"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

"Of course, in cosmic years, we're still quite young."

"Shall we put it in play?"

Lazy man contemplates the moment of creation.

'I just can't keep up with the conversations in deep space.'

"I let go of all my earthly attachments, but there's one I can't seem to shake."

Caterpillar Paranoia

Beware of a first kiss that speaks volumes.

"While Covid is still our top story scientists remain focused on Earth's pending collision with Jupiter."

'What? -- I send you all this great sunlight, and you waste it growing PROTOPLASM?'

"I'm afraid it's 'I do' ... not 'Undo'."

Buffering

'Do you realize it takes over 2000 laws to enforce the ten commandments?'

'Since the universe is rapidly expanding, there's a lot more that we have to worry about now.'

'To become ONE with the Universe, you must first become COMPLIANT with the Universe!'

"My job is not as easy as it looks: You have to learn about astronomy and celestial mechanics to be able to accurately predict sunrise and sunset..."

"Go forth and multiply under the constraint of sustainability within Nature's framework? What the heck is THAT supposed to mean?"

Man reading magazine: 'International Procrastinator.'

"I forget - are we a species that mates for life?"

"Flat-earthers and round-earthers reach a compromise."

Apocalipsis

"This human experiment has gone on long enough. Give the hippos control."

"I should've done this years ago. All the good ones got taken."

Echoes - 'Hellooooo'.

'Do you promise to love,honor and cherish -- until one of you decides to become a 'free agent'?'

"Totality was great, but now that it's over I'm like, 'What am I even doing?'"

'How about bearing false witness for you neighbor?'

"I don't want a divorce, but I would like a gap year."

'All the girls say the same thing. You're a sweet guy, but...'

'Hey, don't look at me -- I was AGAINST free will.'