Communication Jester Gifts

'They just kept sending out memos. Who cared if they made sense?'

Man on stilts on cell phone.

Why do my wife's lips move when I'm talking.

"I said to bring home some perennials. NOT millennials!"

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

Professor Wiles grows insufferable.

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

Hardware and software

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

'To make up for the decline in snail mail deliveries, I've taken to biting my master every time he gets an e-mail.'

Bad Interview Technique

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? My wife doesn't have a job. The other night she told me it'd be nice if I helped out a little more at home. So I replied "hey, I don't ask you to come to my place of business and do my job for me." I see. Have you tried the "act like I never said it and wait for her to forget it" routine? Yes, sir. I also, tried the "don't-make-eye-contact-until-she-forgets-it" maneuver. I'm running out of ideas.

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

"I'm away from my desk or on another line. Please leave a message at the sound of my impersonation of a beep."

"But seriously do you think my eclectic knowledge of the history of the development of the claw hammer makes me more of a sex magnet?"

"Hello?"

"I only have two apps on my phone. One makes me spend all my money and the other gives me embezzling tips."

"Hi, I'm the new IT-security-expert! Where is your server room? I want to see if I can overcome your firewall!"

"I was just ringing to see if you got the e-mail about the letter I sent you?"

'No, I wouldn't like a free quote for central heating! Where did you get this number?'

"Hold music will return after we pause for a commerial"

"There's something you should know about me."

"It's terminal? Brill, I was worried my YouTube channel was loosing it edge."

"Let's just say that you're not trending on any site on the internet!"

Texting Rodeo Clown

'It's for you.'

'Does Santa have skype?. . . I'd like to get in some face time, so he puts me at the top of his list come December. . .'

'Not cars. here we're testing oblivious texters walking into walls.'

Cyber crime.

"Elijah didn't hear God's voice in the powerful wind, or in the earthquake, or the fire, but just then a call came in on his cell..."

'The frowsting bacchant kept his shelty vicinal.'

'The magian didn't have to grouch about the mucker's mafficking.'

Trapeze artists.

Computer clown.