Commercials Gifts

Before we begin tonight's dream, a word from our sponsor...

'I'm a voice over artist.'

'Of course he's an actor. When was the last time you saw a kid enjoy something that was good for him?'

"Hmmm, for some reason I want a snack!"

'Okay, I'll do one more dog food commercial, but I don't want to get typecast.'

'...But the good news is TV ads have been promoting the idea that money isn't everything.'

'I'm using my eyes, how are you looking at it?'

"Play it like, sure, the world sees you as just a hamburger, but you know there's so much more to you than that."

"Baldo, this is my friend Hidalgo. He was an actor who starred in TV commercials back in the sixties!"

'Hey! -- that Maytag repairman is an impostor!'

'Yummo Toothpaste contains no caffeine, and cleans your teeth better than Coke or Pepsi!'

'I love it, the chief loves it. The client loves it but the Gods don't love it.'

"If this ad drives you crazy, you may be entitled to compensation."

"You know that drug commercial where everyone is laughing and running around with friends and dogs enjoying the beautiful day? What are they on?"

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

"Play the old Winston jingle."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'How fast can you hype?'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

This Message Has No Content

"Think of it as buying in – not selling out."

'As our new company logo, I'm not quite sure it's sending out the right message.'

Lethal Presentation

Create some buzz!

'If only every year was an election year.'

If nobody had invented graphics