Comic Picker Gifts

"Ask me about mazes."

"How can you be out of wings?"

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

International Women's Day

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"It's not the persistent lack of sunlight or freezing temperatures that bother me - it's the crowds I can't stand."

Dog chews 'The Cat Book'.

Billy. The Kid.

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

The Fourth Little Pig

I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.

'Okay, is there anybody else whose homework ate their dog?'

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

"Relax. I just had a vitamin."

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

No-Work Orange

"We're keeping you overnight because the nurses love you!"

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

'If corporate lawyers are a dime a dozen, where are the other ten?'

Welcome Spring.

"Have you been playing dice?"