Comic Judge Gifts

"I find in favour of Aggie's Day Care. Defendant is ordered to sit in the corner for one hour."

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

'Court's in recess!'

Nerd tryouts.

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

"Impartiality becomes you."

Judge to attorneys in courtroom wearing boxing gloves: 'Looks like you're both ready for your opening arguments, gentlemen?'

'Judge Mental.'

"In view of the new evidence, my client would like to change his plea to 'guilty-ish', M'Lud."

"Simple yes or no. Are the cartoons funny?"

Judge

Unnatural Selection.

"So, I’d love for us to think of this as less of a trial and more of a curated trial experience."

"And what's more, you have a complete disrespect for the law."

Dreary counsel sending the judge and jury to sleep

"We all make mistakes, as Your Honor knows, having been twice reprimanded by the New York State Commission on Juridical Conduct."

"O.K., O.K., house arrest."

'Well, if you DNA made you do it, I'm sentencing your DNA to thirty years in prison.'

"My attorney feels it's unwise for me to continue to represent you."

'Promise to tell the truth, including the parts you'd prefer to keep for an upcoming book or movie deal?'

Perpetual motion car

Your honor, my client is a very proud man. He's much too proud to confess to murder, and he's much too proud to beg for mercy. However, he's willing to offer the court a non-denial and a rude hand gesture. Where can we go with this?

"Looks like they're going to have a dog fight."

"Saying you're moral because you believe in God is like saying you're a soldier because you play 'Call of Duty'."

"I know you insisted on getting off here, but this area is for employees only. Are you sure you know where you're going?"

"I forgot to call in dead."

'STANDARD AMERICAN MOONDOGGIE'

Cancel Culture and Stand-Up Comedy

Newspapers stink. Newspaper comics stink. Nobody reads them. They're old school. I read a new generation of online comics. Check out this one. It's called expletive deleted monkey. @#$% and @#$%? Expletive deleted and the @#$%? Expletive deleted in the raunchy adjective deleted house. It's a family strip. I'm going to wash out my computer with soap.

I'm not a snob in the usual sense. I don't mind if a guy is from the wrong side of the tracks, but I do mind if he's from the wrong side of the gutter. AS you know, the "gutter" is the term for the space between panels in a comic strip. ! !

'...Plus thirty days for not turning off your damn cell phone!'

The US Supreme Court displays its rulings out front.

Evaluating the humorousness of cartoons.