Comic Gourmet Pillows

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

'Yes Sir that is the lowest calorie dish on the menu, the chef has even eaten the fish for you. He says it was wonderful.'

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

'The Specials are the same as the Main Menu dishes, but with more florid descriptions.'

'Lets all thank Martha for her very innovative 'Hot Dog Crepes'.'

'Our guest tonight certainly needs no introduction.'

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

"I like my steak well done."

Cat eating fish from fishbowl.

What makes the flies in your soup "artisanal"? I know, right? Personally, I think it's just a lot of hype perpetrated by the flies. Menu.

Supermarket Warehouse. At night, with just security here, the products sing classic karaoke. The orange juice is belting Elvis'"All Shook Up." Peanut butter and jelly performed a duet of "Love Will Keep Us Together." children's breakfast cereal sang "Sugar, Sugar." And sriracha sauce did a rendition of "Great Balls of Fire"! What song will the ground beef choose? Jimmy Buffett's "Cheeseburger in Paradise," of course!

Waiter: 'Your Tossed salad Ma'am.'

Stand back - while I whip something up

'The stuff legends are made of'

'The chef's hat was delicious! But the hair...'

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

Haute Cuisine Meets Low Couture

"Monsieur Proust, we would like to discuss product placement for one of our cakes...."

The mushroom pickers

"We've gone 'Glutton-Free'."

Frisbee dog catching pizza dough

Lemon beelzebub for table 666

'It's all made by stateless people, wanderers, nomads, whose only anchor is cheese.'

'No, I don't have a favorite. Dung is dung.'

Chinese Novel Cookie

'Coool! What's that called? 'Suicide bomber chicken'?'

"Oh, how nice. You're just in time to cut the vegetables,"

Picasso paints AND eats like a child!

"Some volcano roll!"

"If you tasted like a Umami, where would you be hiding?"

'I add the juice of one bottle of brandy.'

Why Shirley hates to eat genetic modified Broccoli.

Those who bought my cookbook with the transposed pages will get a refund. Those who actually enjoy Lobster Alfredo a la mode - bon app

The Puffin Restaurant: Today's special - regurgitated sand eels