Comic Food Lover Gifts

"Hold on ... I think a table's about to open up."

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

'You caught 'em. You clean 'em.'

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

Waiter: 'Your Tossed salad Ma'am.'

Cook au vin

'In case of fire, don't panic. Pay your bill then leave.'

'The stuff legends are made of'

Large Very Fresh Eggs

'Well, that's the last of the garlic repellent.'

'Deputy, I asked 'when are you going to a restaurant?' Not 'arrest your aunt'.'

"Keep it in the sling and rub hot sauce on our wing every 4 hours."

Grand rounds vs. ground rounds.

Lemon beelzebub for table 666

"In addition to the menu, we have a few specials on the board."

'Aw, cool! Look! They got us a hot tub!'

'Of course I'd never have so much as looked at Timothy if it wasn't for his nose for truffles.'

"I try not to be picky, but this meal is a bit too sticky!"

'Who ordered the mushy peas?

'In a four-star restaurant, one's hat does not fall into the cassoulet de castenaudary. But if ones hat does fall into the cassoulet de castelnaudary, one does not put it back on one's head.'

Menu From The Luxury Home of Pancakes

'A dozen bagels, please. For here.'

"That's it, deep fried or mashed. Do you want a job or not?"

'Sorry,Sir - we only have the one.'

'Hey! My Chili is Chilly!' 'I'll add some Chilies!'

"I fear this place is going downhill."

'What price range did you have in mind?'

"Keep that recipe handy. The police might want it as evidence."

'Thinner!'

"You still use too much yeast in your bread!"

'This the plan...we will make the clients think that there is a contest, and the winner will be the first one who finds a finger in the soup.'

"Eat your greens. . . and your pinks and yellows and blues."