Comic Food Lover Gifts

"Hold on ... I think a table's about to open up."

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

'You caught 'em. You clean 'em.'

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

Cook au vin

'In case of fire, don't panic. Pay your bill then leave.'

Waiter: 'Your Tossed salad Ma'am.'

'The stuff legends are made of'

Large Very Fresh Eggs

"In addition to the menu, we have a few specials on the board."

'Well, that's the last of the garlic repellent.'

Grand rounds vs. ground rounds.

'Deputy, I asked 'when are you going to a restaurant?' Not 'arrest your aunt'.'

"Keep it in the sling and rub hot sauce on our wing every 4 hours."

Lemon beelzebub for table 666

'Aw, cool! Look! They got us a hot tub!'

'Of course I'd never have so much as looked at Timothy if it wasn't for his nose for truffles.'

I'm looking for an entr

'In a four-star restaurant, one's hat does not fall into the cassoulet de castenaudary. But if ones hat does fall into the cassoulet de castelnaudary, one does not put it back on one's head.'

"I try not to be picky, but this meal is a bit too sticky!"

'Who ordered the mushy peas?

Menu From The Luxury Home of Pancakes

'A dozen bagels, please. For here.'

"That's it, deep fried or mashed. Do you want a job or not?"

"You still use too much yeast in your bread!"

"Keep that recipe handy. The police might want it as evidence."

'Sorry general, but this is a four star restaurant.'

'This the plan...we will make the clients think that there is a contest, and the winner will be the first one who finds a finger in the soup.'

"Eat your greens. . . and your pinks and yellows and blues."

The Family Joules: Part 13

'What price range did you have in mind?'

'Sorry,Sir - we only have the one.'

'Hey! My Chili is Chilly!' 'I'll add some Chilies!'

"I fear this place is going downhill."