Comedy Show Devotee Gifts

Noel Fielding

"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

Theatre Crowd

America's Funniest Interest Rate Hikes

'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.

'You have an enlarged funny bone.'

"Sorry, my report is blank. I just stayed home, watched tv and played video games during vacation."

TV and cleaner

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

War Heros Variety Night (playing a tune on his medals).

Bunny Pranks

Good Morning Britain

"What do you mean you watched ahead?"

Dr Moo and the Cyber-Cows!

My client vigorously denies your charges. He says he has great respect for what makes you special. He knows that you like Amy Winehouse, watching The Office, secondhand clothes. You're reading off my Facebook page. He knows you're on Facebook. You're both off my friends list.

"Your Honor, the witness, in my opinion, has failed to establish credibility."

Watching telly

Dante Alighieri

Are they dangerous? Only if I shut off the tv.

TV and man

'A fight has broken out between Dr. Who fans and Star Trek fans. No hurry, the likelihood of anyone getting hurt is very small.'

'Larry, did you feel THAT? Your career just peaked! And on MY show! Isn't that fantastic?'

"I'm going to binge watch all 600 episodes of my favorite show. I'll talk to you in a few weeks."

Trump's firings

"She died doing what she loved."

'Everything these days is influenced by television.'

'For the next sixty seconds, this station will make an annoying 'BEEEEP' sound....'

'There's nothing worth watching on TV, but he's not going to let a little thing like that stop him.'

I brake for anything discarded that I can bring to the Antiques Roadshow

'Did you or did you not make my client laugh so hard that milk came out his nose, causing the kids at his cafeteria table to laugh at him?'

Singulars: spaghetto, broccolo, jacuzzo.

Ashton Kutcher

"How many times are young going to playback that last episode of 'Friends'?"

Knock loudly. I'm binge-watching Netflix.

"They went together, doctor!"