Comedy Motorist Gifts

'I'm sensing a lot of road rage.'

"I need to tinkle."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

CLEAR!

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

"Don't you ever run off again to get your oil changed without telling me."

'Beware of SUV.'

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

'Yeah, truck makers are going vertical instead of horizontal with the extended cabs now. It's the latest trend...'

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

"It's garage music."

"Your new car won't start? Oh, well, umm…that's just the car's Collision Avoidance System kicking in. It doesn't want you to hit anything today."

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

No Hand Signals

'Power steering.'

"I can't work on this one. It's too ticklish."

No U-turns

Lucky car.

Australian Sat Nav - 'Straight on mate'.

Speed Checked By Radar.

Pine tree driving a truck with a human-shaped air freshener hanging off the mirror

"It's a hybrid if you think it is. Runs on gas and the power of positive thinking."

Exclamation road sign says 'OMG'

'Why can't you ride under the dash like other airbags?'

"So tell me about your early years on the road..."

"..and I've recently had it converted to LGP"

"I got a 'millennial anti-theft device' in my car." "Steering wheel lock?" "Stick shift."

Driver with a rear view mirror attached to his forehead.

Traffic sign: Right lane ends - Merge into oncoming traffic.

Road rage in the car-to-car technology era.