Comedy Cosmonauts Gifts

"Did you hear about Henderson? He went out with his fly open."

"It's clear to me that you want to go far with this company."

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

"Remember when we used to wonder if there other beings somewhere out there?"

Marry me astronaut

"Not now, Oliver."

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

Save Our Universe

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

Neil Armstrong Outtakes

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

"Sir, a bunch of bald-headed, castrated humanoids wearing Nikes just materialised with their luggage back there."

"Oh well, at least it's not Earth."

"Siri, find oxygen."

"I told you it was a book you couldn't put down."

Astronaut love

Newborn Cosmonaut

"We found three sort-of Earthlike planets around a nearby star." "Do you think any of them have video games?" "I've been trying to work out the odds of an intelligent species arising and evolving thumbs capable of holding an X-box controller." "Proof of video games would change everything." "I wonder what the aliens on those planets consider sexy." "Living beings creating simulated beings they can smash is the hallmark of an intelligent species."

Angel doing the hula hoop.

An astronaut parties with aliens on the wing of his spaceship.

"Do you think it's a form of greeting?"

Climbing to the moon...

"Okay, haha, very funny, you guys. Now toss down the ladder."

"So what do you do for a living?"

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

'One small step for dog. One giant setback for the invisible fence.'

'Sir, we're receiving a signal from space. It might be a candidate for possible intelligent alien life!' 'Nice going you ninny, you butt-dialled Earth! Now they're going to know we exist!'

"You used to be way more attractive!"

"Not that type of Moon-rock..."

"That's many giant leaps for man."

"When was your last meta-physical?"

"Are there space-babes?"

Rocket to the Moon

"There's no need to howl at every moon we pass by."

"I’ve got to wake up early so I’m just going to wear my clothes for tomorrow to bed."