Comedy Clucker Gifts

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

"The subwoofers really help."

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

Darwin first tested his theory in a letter to a magazine ('Lookalike' letter points to similarity between man and ape.)

"Yeah, our garden is always a mess: We can't stop ourselves foraging for worms..."

"When Butcher Bob gets back from lunch this one is getting a vasectomy."

"Go deep!"

An Early Ventriloquist Meets His Future Dummy

Hen Night

'Ain't no lonelier life than being a free-range chicken boy.'

'I think cowboys are just plain lazy: Why else would you have to carry them all the time?'

'The hair plugs are that noticeable, huh?'

Kisses--Sniff Your A-hole.

Wall Cluck.

Corona virus: "Wow, I seem to be getting lots of attention lately."

Keyboard in Heaven

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

"It's weeder's elbow."

'You want a second opinion? -- Oh, a big shot, eh?'

'I plucked myself. It reduces drag in the water.'

"Pandemic! That's a pretty name."

"It's all very well being healed, but that mobility scooter cost a fortune."

"Mom, are we vegetarians for ethical or religious reasons?"

'Get with it, buddy -- that mile of highway you adopted has snow all over it!'

'Bless you!'

If this works, our entertainment worries are long gone!

Clay pigeon shooting

'Which came first, the chicken or the egg?'

"Honest dear, those other 39 hens don't mean a thing to me!"

"What's all this I've been hearing about the Cloud?"

J-J-JOE'S B-B-BAR, 'Actually, Joe's done pretty well for a guy with a speech impediment.'

"I just talked to Grunzman on the phone when he called in sick...I fear he really has got something very, very highly contagious!"

'Hey - I was in line first! There you go again...messing up the pecking order!'