Comedy Cinematographer T-Shirts

"Making a documentary about a week in the life of a cat has proved to be less challenging than I anticipated."

Occu-Pie Mars

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Zombie standup

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

'This should be perfect. The main characters fall in love during a series of explosions.'

Working in the Hazard Zone!

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

Giraffe Selfie

Canned laughter for sale in Theatrical Supplies shop.

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

Canadian film production

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

"Amateurs."

A knight sent to kill a dragon armed with a fly swatter

"Get off the stage and get a copy of 'Studies of Laughter in Interaction'—I think you'll enjoy it."

"All stories have been told, all songs have been sung. But that won't stop us from making movie reboots."

Tim Burton

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

Filming Christmas

'When you said this movie's about a fish out of water, I was expecting more of a light-hearted comedy.'

Kirsten Johnson

"Citizen Kane first draft... Citizen Kane By Orson Welles & Herman J. Mankiewicz Int. Kane's bedroom Kane's old voice Call a freaking ambulance! Rosebud..."

"And the award for the best use of AI in a movie goes to..."