Comedically Confrontational Pillows

"I'm gonna stomp all over your face."

Spiro & Pusho: watering the vine and the neighbour.

Whiskey wars

The Nihilist Deli.

"Listen, I've had 25 fights and won all but 24 of them."

"The first week back is always the hardest"

Husband electronic tagging control centre - Screen reads 'Pub'

"Well which do you think is more likely, your pillow is growing hair or you're losing yours?"

'You misunderstand, squire. All I do is guarantee that my cars are USED!'

"My dad really went ballistic! I'm not grounded...I'm under house arrest!"

'OK, pal, you've called me a little shrimp for the last time - let's see what you're made of!'

"Hello?- Anyone here?"

"I'm not drunk! I'm jush looking for my car keyish."

'Blessed before 20/01/00'

'Happy Valentine's Day!'

Jungle explorers face giant hairball.

Enlightenment sounds okay, but I've decided to go with willful ignorance instead!

"Yipes! Grownups!!"

'The ligaments in both legs are torn to shreds. However, the drumsticks, thighs, wings and breasts should still be fine... either baked or fried.'

'When he said he loved going to Wendy's, I just assumed fast food...'

Chuckie's test results come back negative.

'Blunt women are usually dull.'

"Your tired eyes are red and irritated because you put sleeping medicine in them. That's not how it works, Mr. Jenkins."

Father afraid of daughters VAT inspector boyfriend

Man with a nail in his hammer

'You don't need GPS to take out the trash, Kevin.'

Passive-aggressive street signs

'No daughter of mine is marrying a good-for-nothing banker.'

'So when you say 'Jesus Christ that hurts', does that mean for the purposes of patient feedback that you're happy with the standard of care?'

"The last thing I remember was the flight attendant saying I had too many drinks ... "

I have the feeling that you live like there's no tomorrow, Mr. Fusco. I'm not quite that reckless, doctor. I live like there's no day after tomorrow.

"Oh, so NOW you switch the captions off!"

"If you are still unhappy with your current allowance compensation, may I once more suggest to you a life of crime."

'The flight was okay, but the TAXI got hijacked!'

'It has less to do with loneliness than with the fact that I live in a flood-prone area and I can't swim.'