Confrontations Pillows

Meat eating man faced with gigantic chicken

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

Very Difficult Conversations

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

Correct Comics *Drawn By A Vegetarian On Acid-Free Recycled Paper In A Drug-Free Environment

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

"How about a hand."

'You've got the wrong idiot, number.'

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

Dialogue

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

"Of course, that's just my opinion. If you want my professional opinion it will cost you."

'Who's a pretty boy! Is that all you've got to say?'

'The trouble with Nigel is that he's so changeable. One minute I love him and the next minute I loathe him.'

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

A lesson in wit

Young girl asks young boy what time he wakes in the morning

'It's funny - I'm a Bourbon, but I've always preferred Scotch.'

"You might be poor and ugly but you're the only one who didn't blather about politics and climate change after ten minutes. What's your name? Marry me!"

I'm beginning to regret the hearing aids.

"Oh, that reminds me of this article I barely remember."

"I find it a very good conversation starter."

'Sorry, what was that?'

'And what do you do for a living Gary?' 'I'm a Puppeteer.'

"Who are you looking at? Want to kick off, do you?"

"Don't preted to hibernate when I'm talking to you."

Before birds and bees,

'Brian hated his long legs and dinner parties'

*My wife doesn't understand me...

'It depends on whether you see yourself as yesterday's man, today's man, or tomorrow's man.'

"You know why men die earlier than women? Because they can."

Frequently Asked Questions