Comedic Spirits Gifts

'It's a vest for life.'

Clancy Strip: Money and Beer

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

Get crazy once in a while

'Well if I'm so 'bloody useless' perhaps you'd better read the map!'

Diving Cat.

I'm getting old, I spotted a couple of brown hairs among the punk.

'Well, given that you have three broken ribs, laughing is bound to be painful...'

To prevent Christmas git opening from being over in a flash, the Wagner kids were required to use only their feet.

"It's our latest celebrity scent, it's called Elon Musk. It smells like money!"

Washing Machine Torture

'I wish I looked like a model.'

'Nice this kite sailboat. But how do you actually land it?'

'I warned her that too much dieting could be a danger to her health!'

'Have you put her on the strict diet I prescribed?'

"My mating dances were unsuccessful, so I tried reciting poetry: didn't work either..."

Christmas tree wishing to hang tree cutter

"I'm $37,000 in debt for my theatre degree. I may be acting, but my tears are real."

'Wouldn't it have been easier to cut off the top of the tree?'

Why Men Get Angry and Why Women Get Angry

Birds in a birdhouse watching TV.

'The only good drive I made all morning was the ride back from the stupid golf course.'

'When you invited me out fot dinner, I thought you meant...' 'Shhh!'

'What I want for Christmas is a bigger carrot'

'Man, why don't you get a life!'

Bob's Marriage Advice: 'Let me give you some advice on marriage, Joe. . . try to think of me as the pope. . .'

Teapot

'Milton, you really did make it to the other side!'

"Do I look like the sort who knows anything about lawns?"

". . . ashes to ashes, dust to dust, a handful of ground coriander, the zest of a lemon. . ."

"J is the reason for the season."

"Hey, baby - that doesn't mean you!"

Christmas wish of a COVID Vaccine.

He's working his way up to lions!

'Yes, Master is drunk, but don't worry, I've stolen his car keys...'