Comedic Rivalry Lover Gifts

'Say you're sorry and promise to give him a rossette.

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

After the gun ban, the guys still liked to go out and horse around on weekends.

Golf Hole at bottom of lake.

"...And don't give me that 'I hope his precious little Blackhawks lose' look either!"

The date was going well. She was better looking, but he was about to gain the nutritional edge.

"That's $20 for you if you pluck the tail feathers off my rival over there..."

"You say that I love the Liverpool football team more than I love you?...."

'The rivalry at the pony club is getting out of hand.'

"For me it's all about the craft of acting."

'Our competition is quite energetic.'

Analysts have said the US and Russia are closer to nuclear war than ever. The outcome of the election tomorrow will probably determine whether we live in mediocrity … or whether we suffer a nuclear apocalypse in which a crafty café owner, who's squirreled away scones and ammunition in a vast network of underground bunkers, could rise to become feudal warlord of a brand new world. So ... who are you voting for again? The person I've been preparing ever since 2nd grade to vote for.

'...I really wish you would of told me you wanted to be a ballerina before we got married.'

'Friends are important...but you need enemies to keep your edge.'

'I didn't recognize your old boyfriend at first. He's got a new car.'

Therapist wearing a Yankees' cap talks with an upset patient wearing a Mets cap.

'OK, pal, you've called me a little shrimp for the last time - let's see what you're made of!'

On the start position

Oxford-Cambridge Boat Race, 1870 - Crews before Boarding

Golden Village: Lawn Mowing Races

One-Up-Manship Valentine's Day

The Club Singles Duel.

The Chicken and the Egg

Winner of Horse jumping competition hit by loser

'Sunnyside down.'

". . . And, Reggie, if you're willing to give me one more chance, I promise never to flirt with another man again!"

Man in a Chain Gang has a Peg Leg.

'Looks like we're going to have to settle this by having a fish-off.'

Dog in pet shop beats the competition by hold a sign saying 'Has Fleas'.

"My skyscraper's taller than yours."

"You never laugh at my jokes."

"Looks like someone is moving in on Bobby's Girl."

'They're Home!!!... HA-HA-HA... you are soooo busted!'

'Let him struggle; it's the only exercise he gets.'

Detroit Lions fan psychiatric patient