Comedic Mismanager Gifts

Research continues to discover if the inability to balance a checkbook is genetic.

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

"Again? This is the last time I'm letting you wear the pants with the little zipper."

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

"Does knowing you're being watched on a baby monitor keep you out of mischief?"

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

Mittens is challenged by the string.

Child about to jump off ironing board into bath.

Monkey Curling Lion's Mane.

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

'Everything I say to you goes in one ear and out the other.'

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

Dogs life

'It was the little darling's first time sitting up at the dining table!'

'He licked all my tongue depressors.'

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

"Thank God you're home. Someone crapped on the carpet again."

"While you were out, the staff whittled away your desk into a totem pole."

Two children play with a pedal bin

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

"Missing a call is no excuse for eating your assistant."

"Hey team, meet our new V.P. of acquisitions and mergers." (businessman introducing a vicking, barbarian)

'The part I love is when they come home and say 'WHO did this?. . .'

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'Don't worry, son. This bed inking incident will be our little secret.'

'Should-do and shouldn't-do sound a lot alike.'

Teacher's pet dog

"Come on boy. Tell Daddy where you buried the leg of lamb."

'I'm sure they don't think you're really a bad kitty...just a kitty that sometimes does bad things.'

"You're an overweight, overpaid, over-the-hill senior executive, Dalrymple. What did you have in mind to remedy that situation?"