Comedic Exaggerator Gifts

Fish Story

'Yes, I did suggest you enlarge that photo of you and your car. However...'

Fishing Tales

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

'What a CV - if you can write memos like this you'll go far in our organisation.'

Alarmistclock

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

Early accounting scandals.

'Incidentally, our health insurance has limited eye coverage.'

An exaggeration of estate agents

'...and that's the one that got away!'

"Don't worry - you've got to expect a few midge bites on holiday..."

National Hyperbole Society: Inspirational & Outstanding

'You're an estate agent aren't you?'

'I gave him the old one-two, but then he gave me three, four, five, six, seven and eight!'

'When I said in my on-line profile that I was athletic, I meant that I like watching sports!'

"Don't be so dramatic, you've only got a cold!"

"And that one I tagged with a flamethrower from ten yards."

“At what point does it stop being just moths, and start being Pestilence?”

"The fish gets bigger every time he tells the story."

"Okay. It's a balloon. Get over it."

'Oh, I would say it was at least twice that size, and it had fangs and horns too...'

Used car salesman to man: 'And this one was driven by a little old lady ...er ...uh ... with 36 grandchildren.'

Fishing Stories

"Hard work, determination, success!"

"I wish to complain about the chlorine level in the swimming pool. . ."

'You were featured on Rogue Traders'

"When Dennis gets a cold everyone has to know about it"

"I said it was INSPIRED by a true story."

"It strikes me you're making a deal more fuss over this than it calls for, Dan'l."

"You heard right, mom...the boss made me his plant manager!"

'I can tell this fish story just fine by myself, man's best friend.'

Fred's last lie.

'What accounts for my prolific output as a political pundit? They pay me by the word.'