Comedic Enthusiasts Gifts

No, thank you, I brought my own bag.

'No hot water? That's OK. I only take cold showers.'

Bikers; Cat and Mouse hang on for dear life.

'I threw my old t-shirt out and bought this for two quid.' - 'The stitching has come loose so I want to get a refund... but the bus fare into town will cost more than the refund.' - 'Now I'm stuck in a logical loop... and I'm chilly.'

"We car mechanics are like surgeons - we find it unpleasant if everything is finished but there are still parts left..."

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"Now you've seen the bust how about letting me see Naples?"

Trumpeter swan meets trombone swan.

Sale on Bathing Suits, One Size Fits None.

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'Choose, Fenster

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

'Bye dear! I'll have another nice reindeer steak ready for you when you get back.'

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

'Wine represents all things civilized. It's an artistic expression, a manifestation of cultural enlightenment...'

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

'It's Blurred.'

"We're gonna need a bigger comic."

I know I'm not qualified for the job, but watch my incredible video resume anyway. It got an Honorable Mention at Cannes!

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

'All You Can Eat Wings.'

'This month I'll be cooked & my bones ripped apart in a wishing contest.'

Sleigh Ride

'In an unexpected development, an illegal alien won 'American Idol.''

'When you said you were a bee keeper...'

'As you can see, the region is full of investment opportunities.'

"Young lady! You aren't going anywhere dressed like that!"

The violin lesson

"You heading south again this summer?"

A guy is looking at his car that's about to go over some falls.

'Binocular, infra-red camera, directional microphone: Let's go and do some stalking...'

"It's the naps you don't take that you regret the most."

'Guess what, I got a job tallying bananas.'

"Well, technically, he's supposed to draw the sword from the stone....but I'm not going to argue the point."